70% of users are dissatisfied with the process
50% of customers regret their buying decision
46% turnover among new buyers
46% failure rate from the process
Less than 20% of transactions ate successful

If these numbers were related to customer satisfaction, a business could not survive. It is clear how these numbers would have a dramatic impact on the profitability and viability of the business. However, these numbers are not about customer satisfaction, but rather come from a study of recruiting and retention processes by Dr. John Sullivan. What is interesting is that many businesses do not even measure the effectiveness of this key business process. According to Sullivan, less that 30 percent of companies measure the quality of hires, and less than this measure key elements of the talent management process.

In one survey, 70% percent of applicants and 28 percent of hiring managers (Source: Staffing.org) were dissatisfied with the hiring process. The biggest complaint that I hear from job applicants about the hiring process, is that they are left hanging throughout the process. The company doesn’t follow up or fails to get back to the candidate when they it promised to do so. As a rule of thumb, the company should put closure on every solicited resume or application it receives. I don’t think it is necessary to put closure on unsolicited resumes. As soon as a candidate is eliminated from consideration they should be told, with email being a very efficient and low cost way to do this. Keep applicants who you are interested in informed of the status of the selection process. I know a friend who took a less desirable job since he never heard back from his primary interest weeks after an interview. Two months later the company called to make an offer.

The failure rate of new hires is significantly high according to many studies.
25% of new hire regret taking the job (Source: Challenger, Gray)
50% of hiring managers and new hires later regret their decision (Source: The Recruiting Roundtable)
46% of new hires leave their job within one year (Source: eBullpen, LLC)
50% of current employees are actively seeking a new job (Source: Deloitte)
46% of new hires are categorized as failures within the first 18 months on the job (Source: Leadership IQ)
40% of newly promoted managers fail within 18 months of starting a new job (Source: Manchester, Inc.)

The cost of this failure in the selection process has incredible economic implications. According to McKinsey & Co., top performers increase productivity, revenue, and profit by 40 to 67 percent over average performers. Businesses are leaving lots of money on the table as the result of making poor hiring or internal selection decisions.

The principles of process improvement used for years in manufacturing can be applied to improving the selection process. The first step is to have a clear definition of job requirements. Think about trying to deliver a product without knowing what the customer wanted. The same is true of selection. Job requirements go beyond skills, knowledge, and experience—they must include behavioral and attitudinal factors as well.

Once the job requirements have been clearly defined, there needs to be a system in place to match candidates to the requirements. The primary reason for poor selection decisions after the job requirements have been defined, is inaccurate or incomplete information about the candidate. If we knew exactly what type of person we needed and knew everything about a candidate relative to those requirements, there would be very few selection mistakes.

To improve the accuracy of information, these elements need to exist:

A formalized process for seeking all public information about a candidate which includes background checks. An underutilized tool is to Google a person’s name and see what comes up. I found out someone I knew was a convicted felon by simply by Googling his name and found a newspaper article about the situation.

A highly trained and skilled group of interviewers who know to ask the right (and legal) questions to learn as much as they can about a candidate. Interviewers should be required to independently evaluate candidates using a formal system.

Assessments provide valuable information that is very difficult to get through other means. Properly designed and validated assessment instruments are instrumental to improving the selection process.

Even if the job requirements were clearly defined and the best candidate chosen for the job, there is still more to the process. The popular term for this is “onboarding”. For most employees, the most exciting day of their career was their first day on the job. Then it goes downhill from there.

Companies should have a formal onboarding process for new employees. There are a number of resources available that provide ideas and structure for such a program. One particular aspect of onboarding that I get involved in is helping new supervisors and managers hit the ground running in their new job. Many new managers have never received any form of training and I find that the first 90 days are essential to the long term success of a manager.

Ryan Scholz works with leaders whose success is dependent on getting commitment and high performance from others. He is author of Turning Potential into Action: Eight Principles for Creating a Highly Engaged Work Place. For more information, visit his web site at www.lead-strat-assoc.com.

Read online: Talent Management – Measuring Success

The best coaches are supportive.

Knowing and agreeing with that idea is one thing. Knowing what that means and being able to identify and exhibit supportive behaviors is something else entirely. And that is the point of this article: identifying and explaining some specific behaviors that will help you be supportive of others.

Eight Supportive Behaviors

Collaborate. As a leader or supervisor, you cannot do everyone`s work, or do their work for them. You must, of course, delegate and empower others to do their work. And yet as a leader you must create a sense of shared ownership. You need to see yourself (and the team needs to see you) as a part of the team. While your role may be different, you are still a part of the team. When you see yourself, and act as a part of the team, others will feel supported in their actions. Remember, delegation isn`t the same as abdication, and as such you must see yourself as a collaborator.

Help/assist. Along this same line, you support others when we are willing to lend a hand. My earliest and best experience with this concept is thanks to my father. Growing up on a commercial hog farm meant that there were always some (very) unpleasant jobs to be done. On many occasions I remember being given these unsavory jobs while Dad was away at a meeting or tending to other farm-related business. In most every case, if he returned while I was still doing the unsavory task, he changed his clothes and picked up a pitchfork or shovel. Perhaps you lead a team who has tasks you can`t do directly. If that is the case you can still assist. Find out what you can do to help, especially when the timeline is short and the work is long.

Empathize. To empathize is to understand how the other person feels. One of the most important things you can ever do is let people know you understand how they are feeling. You may not agree with their perspective, you may even think there were actions they could have taken to avoid the situation they now find themselves in (those may be points for personnel coaching at the appropriate time). But legitimately empathizing is one of the most supportive things you can do for another person or group.

Recognize someone`s value. I`m guessing your children don`t always exhibit behaviors you approve of, yet we all will always love our children. And think about it, even little children can tell the different between their behavior and their intrinsic value. When you let people know you value them as an individual you are supporting them. When you do have to give feedback about performance, it is important that you separate performance from who they are. We are supportive when we care about people and show it (and not just say it).

Recognize their goals and interests. People are more than their on-the job performance. When you know something about people`s strengths, interests and long term objectives, you can often help them reach those objectives and support those interests. This isn`t about giving people complete freedom to do whatever they want on the job. To the contrary, you are being supportive of others when you help them succeed in their current job – and help them reach toward their personal and professional goals too.

Listen. One of the most supportive things you can do (for anyone) is to really listen. This is even truer when you are in any position of power (or perceived to be). Stop what you are doing. Remove the distractions. Be quiet, and listen. When you listen you are showing you value their feelings and opinions. When you listen you are communicating that you care. This may seem so basic, but it is so powerful. Why? Because most people reported that they are rarely truly listened to. Yet, when someone takes the time to really listen actively, it is a meaningful and memorable conversation. When that person listening is our leader or supervisor, it is even more supportive and more powerful. Always remember the power of listening, especially when you are in a position of power or influence with the other person.

Give positive feedback. Do you want to be more supportive? Tell people more often what they do well and what they are doing right. Almost no know hears this type of feedback often enough. Almost everyone I know has a story about a specific piece of positive feedback they received in their life – often in their distant past. Ask people to tell you their stories. You`ll be able to tell in their words and their eyes how powerful and supportive specific and genuine positive feedback can be.

Create positive exchanges. Do you know people who seem to light up the room . . . when they leave? That`s the opportunity I am talking about here! Make it your goal that every conversation, exchange and encounter with you leaves the other person feeling good or better about themselves, their situations and/or life in general. That statement is a benchmark that may be very difficult to live up to; however, making it your goal will allow you to be a more supportive person.

When you exhibit these behaviors in a genuine, authentic way you encourage and support people to become the very best they can be. Isn`t that the goal of coaching anyway?

Leaders know that to be successful they must be effective coaches. That is why many of these leaders from around the world have made the Remarkable Leadership Learning System their choice as a one skill at a time, one month at a time approach to becoming a more confident and successful leader. Why? Because coaching is an integral part of the program. This system allows you to learn from other members and experts from a wide variety of fields and backgrounds – all designed to help you become a more effective leader.

Get more than $748.25 worth of leadership development materials including two complimentary months of that unique system as part of Kevin Eikenberry’s Most Remarkable Free Leadership Gift Ever today at MostRemarkableFreeLeadershipGiftEver.com.
Kevin is a bestselling author, speaker, trainer, consultant and the Chief Potential Officer of the Kevin Eikenberry Group (www.KevinEikenberry.com).

Read online: Eight Supportive Behaviors Every Coach (and Every Person) Should Use

For your organization to reach its true potential, it needs to be guided by people with experience, vision, savvy and rigorous leadership qualities. The fact is that effective leaders drives organizational performance and leadership development is vital for the success of any organization.

Before any leadership solutions program can be formulated and implemented, a survey must be made to get a clear picture of the existing situation. This can be done through leadership assessments and leadership audit programs.

Leadership Assessments are flexible tools to evaluate the criteria that drive performance. These include style, judgment, culture fit and potential challenge areas. Assessments are carried out through the use of structured interviews, development centers and simulations.

The information garnered from these assessments can be used for leadership selection, in-depth leader development and succession planning.

Accurate assessment of job performance is vital for the development of effective leaders and this is where 360 degree feedback plays a key role. Realizing that feedback from just one source, usually the supervisor was limited, organizations began gathering performance appraisals from many parties with whom the party had contact.

Also known as multi-source feedback, multi-rater feedback, multi-source assessment, and the full-circle appraisal, this system gathers assessments of an employee’s performance from a range of sources including subordinates, peers and supervisors. Self assessment is also made.

The great strength of this kind of feedback system is that it helps employees understand how their work is perceived by others. In this way they can learn their strengths and weaknesses and thus areas for growth and development.

Effective 360 degree feedback depends on its key components – the raters and the questionnaires they fill in. The success of the initiative hinges on the selection of the raters and development of reliable questionnaires and this is a highly specialized field.

360 degree feedback has been found to be most successful when an expert is involved. You can hire experts from professional human resource organizations to provide high skilled objective services and ensure accurate feedback programs.

Leadership audits are a way to gain insights into the current performance of your http://www.management.about.com/od/leadership/a/FromMgr2Ldr05.htm : leaders and thus identify paths to improvement. Audits can cover effectiveness, performance, alignment, capability and value for money. Other than evaluating the performance of your leaders across various levels within the organization, you can also compare their effectiveness with regional and global organizations and populations.

Once assessments and audits have gathered the necessary information, leadership solutions programs can be implemented. These can take the form of master classes and workshops, multi-rater feedback, team building and leadership exercises, development toolkits, and development centers and simulations. Through a series of varied and tailored activities such as these, the leaders can grow and learn to function well in a range of environments.

Other than enhancing the capabilities of existing leaders, another key task for the strategic organization is to identify the leaders of tomorrow and prime them for their roles.

One important thing to remember is that not only must http://www.kenexa.com/leadership-solutions : Leadership Development program be tailored to individual industries, companies and regions; they have to be tailored to each organization.

This means that the organization itself is unlikely to have the insight and resources to handle things. Only a human resources firm with specialized skills in leadership development can truly have the vision and experience to establish such a program.

Once you start to develop the competencies and capabilities of your leaders including implementing 360 degree feedback, you’ll find wonderful things start happening. Armed with the ability to effectively resolve competitive and economic challenges, your executives, managers and supervisors can increasingly inspire and engage your organization to enhance business performance, unlock your potential and boost your bottom line.

If you’ve decided that investing in your organization’s leaders is the way ahead for your operation, you can find professional firms with the specialized skills and experience to provide the leadership solutions your need. This is the kind of investment that pays rich dividends in the future performance of your organization.

Check the web sites of leading international companies who offer leadership development programs to find the right 360 degree feedback and leadership development programs for your needs.

Andrea Watkins writes articles for Kenexa, a company providing a unique approach to Leadership Development and Leadership Solutions; see how their 360 degree feedback program can help if you are seeking sustainable organizational improvement in your company.

Read online: Leadership Solutions for the Effective Organization

So, leadership is not just knowledge of the subject. It is a personal trait. However, good leaders are usually made and not born. If you have the desire and willpower, you can become an effective leader. Just learn how to create a way for people.

A glimpse of this can be captured through quotes and quotations on leadership. Here are few of my favourite lines:

“There go the people. I must follow them for I am their leader.” Alexandre Ledru-Rollin

“A leader leads by example not by force.” Sun Tzu

“No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself, or to get all the credit for doing it.” Andrew Carnegie

“Control is not leadership; management is not leadership; leadership is leadership…” Dee Hock

“Most bosses know instinctively that their power depends more on employee’s compliance than on threats or sanctions.” Fernanda Bartolme

“We must open the doors of opportunity. But we must also equip our people to walk through those doors.” Lyndon B. Johnson

So, just learn how to create a way for people. Make sure your leadership efforts and energy are focused on creating a way for them. I do not claim that it is an easy task. You do not have to be a genious or have a superior knowledge of everything. Share your vision with people, empower them and create the environment in which they can prosper and accomplish vision. This is leadership.

Davoraldo invites you to visit QuotesHut.com for quality quotes and sayings. If you have been encouraged by the article above to develop your leadership skills, leadership quotes @ Quotes Hut could be a good start. You can also browse other categories of quotes and sayings at the website. Enjoy the quotes!

Read online: Becoming a Leader With Leadership Quotes

We are often predictable in our seemingly irrational behavior if we know what to look for. In Dan Areley’s excellent book “Predictably Irrational” he makes a case for emotions. More and more there are scholarly tomes that point to the vast area of how we feel as the marker for what we do. Another important milestone book is Dan Goleman’s “Emotional Intelligence”. These breakthrough books have been instrumental in changing the way we think about decision making.

At an offsite I was leading the Senior VP asked to see me privately during one of the breaks. “Sylvia” he said in a frustrated tone “I wish you would stop using the “F” word”. I looked at him in disbelief. I had been very appropriate and proper during the morning session “Huh” was all I could initially muster. “You know, you keep asking me how I feel. I haven’t a clue! I know what I think. Feelings are not in my scientific mentality.” We both started to laugh. When we went back in session I asked him what he thought and he told me how he felt. The difference a word makes.

Everyone I know regardless of how high they have risen in an organization can tell stories of foolish, disastrous mistakes that came about from built in biases due to emotions. Studies show that emotions, expectations, social norms, and other invisible seemingly illogical forces shape our reasoning ability.

Once we begin to explore the profound effects of our emotions on what we want or think we need we can break through to make better decisions. Coupled with an excellent book “Nudge: Improving Decisions about Health, Wealth, and Happiness by Richard H. Thaler and Professor Cass R. Sunstein is “Don’t Bring It to Work: Breaking the Family Patterns that Limit Success”. They both show the power of emotions and patterns in the decision making process.

Taking the realm of emotions and going one step down into the invisible place of patterns gives us so much help in understanding that irrational side of why we do what we do. It is not that our minds play tricks on us; it is that we have not taken the time to look back far enough at how the foundation of decision making is formed.

Patterns are behaviors we repeat and repeat and repeat and …okay you get the idea. We repeat in different settings with different people and yet we do the same thing and expect different results, what Einstein defined as insanity.

So many times in my executive coaching sessions a bright, competent senior team member will complain about direct reports who are wasting time and limiting progress. Once we begin to connect the dots they are astounded at the fact that those causing the most annoyance are individuals whose patterns of behavior are so similar to a parent or sibling who had annoyed them in the long ago past.

If you are like many of my clients, you’re still not convinced that delving into your past is helpful or necessary for best ways to make decisions. Areley and German brain scientist John-Dylan Hayes both show the power of the invisible forces in making decisions. Our unconscious brains are engineering our decisions milliseconds before our conscious brains can get around to them. Hayes states “Our brains make decisions based on emotional and rational assessments that we are not aware of; only later after the decision is actually made, do we explain our decisions and actions to ourselves.”

So, take the bull by the horns and begin the process of finding out the why of your decision making process. It’s the iceberg theory. The more you can see under the water, the more you can steer a clear course for your own safety and the safety of those you lead.

Dr. Sylvia Lafair, Author, Leadership Educator, Executive Coach for over 30 years is an authority on leadership and workplace relationships. She is President of Creative Energy Options, Inc. Visit http://www.ceoptions.com and http://www.sylvialafair.com.

Read online: Leadership Strategies: Deciding How to Decide

Wise leaders are always preparing themselves and their group to meet the future. They create a positive and optimistic approach to support themselves and others.

King Solomon, a leader synonymous with wisdom, says: “The intelligent man is always open to new ideas. In fact, he looks for them.”

To learn how to lead is largely a matter of getting acquainted with the development we are a part of, constantly seeking knowledge and new information that will move things forward.

Development takes place all the time. We are in a never-ending process of transitioning from yesterday, to today and towards tomorrow. The world is changing physically, socially, and economically at this very minute. When we recognize that life itself is about development, our task becomes to creatively resolve the various situations we encounter and to see things in new and different ways.

We can all count on situations where we will experience adversities, difficulties or problems. But by accepting change as a natural part of life and leadership, we are taking important steps towards renewal. In effect, we are setting ourselves up to learn more of life’s exciting journey.

Solomon tells us, “A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance.”

Wise leaders realize that success is right on the other side of perceived failures. They see failure as a part of the process of development and as an opportunity to gain experience and to learn. They are constantly asking new questions, and that opens up new perspectives.

Failures contribute to the discovery of weaknesses. Then our analysis of what occurred makes it possible for us to gain support, practice, and learn so we can strengthen what was weak. So, even if this sounds rather strange, we actually learn more from failure than success.

Wise leaders consider adversity as temporary information on how far they have come on their journey. Using adversity, they mobilize people to gain new energy and power for the next step.

They examine perceived failure for the learning inherent in it, and they communicate in a way that produces positive energy in their group, thus building an incentive to take even stronger action.

Solomon tells us, “The swiftest person does not always win the race, nor the strongest man the battle. Wise men are often poor, and skillful men are not necessarily famous.”

Wise leaders realize that – as many say – life is not fair. We are sometimes struck unfairly by losses, which may be heavy burdens to bear.
But even when we suffer considerable losses, we still have something most valuable left, something that no loss can take away: The freedom and power to choose how we will respond to life situations and events, and how we intend to address other people we encounter along the way.

Next to life itself, the power of choice is our greatest gift. Wise leaders choose to respond constructively to life events and situations. They choose to turn the negative into something positive and learn from it. They choose to be grateful for life’s trials – which they view only as opportunities for learning.

We all have access to that power within us. We have to accept life as it is and balance what we receive against that which we expect, so we always will maintain a positive movement forward.

Solomon tells us, “Don’t you know that this good man, though you trip him up seven times, will each time rise again?”

Wise leaders draw strength from setbacks and learn from failures.
They realize that trials make people to grow, that the suffering teaches us patience and patience develops internal strength and character. We mature.
They know that the more experience they gain and the more setbacks they overcome the better and stronger leaders they will become.

Therefore, they are working hard on themselves and their groups to look at every situation from newer and greater perspective. They retain the view that gives them the strength and energy to proceed with commitment and interest.

We are especially important for each other, to support each other in such an approach.

Solomon tells us, “Keep on sowing your seed, for you never know which will grow – perhaps it all will.”

During challenging periods, wise leaders focus on short-term objectives and progress, and they strengthen initiative and the ability to act.

Accomplishing small steps gives encouragement to go further and strengthen the group’s self-confidence and sense of being successful.

Each day, step-by-step dealing with and resolving opportunities, information, and issues that we are facing, brings forward the best in us.
This is how we grow!

Solomon tells us, “Look straight ahead; don’t even turn your head to look.”

Wise leaders teach themselves and their group to identify the focus of concern—that which they can directly affect and that which they can affect in a process forward.

They continue with determination to gather experience, which they then turn into wisdom. They renew their group’s cultures and in this way build the new society. Wise leaders feel the deep pleasure and the call to create the new, better, and greater.

To become a wiser leader:

• View life as a constant process of development.
• View perceived setbacks as opportunities to learn and grow.
• Balance what you receive against what you expect.
• Help your group to analyze in all the different situations what they did well, what could be developed further, and how others have done.
• Focus on short-term objectives and progress in tough periods, which creates energy and positive ambition to keep moving in the face of adversity.
• Know that the situation is never as bad as it seems and never as good as it can be.

Per Winblad is recognized as one of Sweden’s leading management coaches and an experienced leader in achieving leadership excellence. He is the author of the leadership book “The Wisdom of Leadership”, a best-selling book in Sweden that was recently released in the US. In this article Per Winblad reflects on the Wisdom of King Solomon for leaders in business and life. To find out more and get a free video, visit www.perwinblad.com/

Read online: Timeless Wisdom For Modern Leaders – Lead Through Change

An Example
Consider the following real life example. John’s boss asks him when is the report that he been working on going to be ready. John immediately starts to feel under pressure and rather than snap at his boss he grumbles to himself “Why is he always doing this to me? Doesn’t he know I’m working as fast as I can? Who does he think he is? It’s not fair he always picks on me”. John now feels a few familiar emotions that he might package up and call stress. These emotions may be anger, resentment, feelings of injustice or sadness to name a few. If we were to sit down and talk with John what do you think he would consider to be the source of his “negative” emotions? That’s right, more than likely he would see his boss as the problem.

The Model
Now let’s look at this from a different perspective while describing the ABC model. (The ABC model comes from the work of an American psychologist Dr Albert Ellis and is described in greater detail in most books on CBT.)

The “A” stands for activating event and in this case it is when the boss asks John when the report would be ready, a perfectly reasonable request if delivered appropriately.

The “B” stands for the beliefs or thoughts that John has immediately after the request. Why is he always doing this to me?

The “C” is then the consequent emotion which practitioners and researchers of CBT belief arise as a result of the thoughts that John tells himself.

So the chain of events is that A is followed by B is followed by C. Now often the thoughts may happen very quickly, so quickly in fact that they may go unnoticed and John is left thinking that the cause of his “negative” emotions were his boss. This line of thought is also a trap for John because the more he thinks like this the more “negative” emotions will be created which leads to more unresourceful beliefs. This is what can be termed a vicious cycle of events that can quickly spiral out of control. Research has demonstrated that our emotions can be controlled by our thinking, so what we need to do is to think differently in order to experience different emotions. If we can stop then reverse the vicious cycle we can end up with a virtuous cycle instead that will lead to clearer and more resourceful thinking. To do this we add “D” and “E” to the ABC model.

The Change
“D” is about disputing or questioning your unresourceful thinking and “E” stands for the effective result that arises from taking the time for the internal discussion. In the example above John has the belief that his boss is always doing that to him. The word always is a generalisation so John could start disputing whether this is actually always the case and is his boss actually picking on him? If John continues to believe that he is a victim his behaviours and emotions will be that of a victim and this will only perpetuate the cycle for John if other potential bullies or persecutors identify John as an easy target or a whipping boy

An Exercise to Change Your Life and then Your Team

This exercise can be life changing for you and that is no overstatement. Once you begin to change your thinking and feeling your behaviours will naturally and automatically start to change. This is the secret that underlies most successful behaviour change. So, start to identify for yourself what emotions you experience on a daily basis that you may like to start feeling less. People may call these “negative” emotions and that is why I have highlighted the work negative. To me the emotion really isn’t negative – it’s just an emotion, neither negative nor positive, but often we want to feel these negative emotions less often than the positive ones. For instance do you find yourself being angry, sad, depressed, anxious, stressed, resentful or whatever. Ask yourself are these emotions really useful for you? If not then start to become better at spotting the thinking that precedes them and the events that started the thinking. Maybe you could start an ABC diary that can capture the events, the beliefs or thinking and the emotions that follow. Once you have started to identify the ABC then start to dispute and question your thinking that leads the “negative” emotions, you may then start to have new and more resourceful thoughts that can lead to “positive” emotions.

Once you have started to master this change for yourself, if your team hasn’t already started to change because of your changes, then you can start to coach them to become better at identifying and changing their thinking.
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Read online: Building Effective Teams and Dealing with the True Cause of Stress Using this Simple NLP Model

Vampires are defined as corpses who have risen from the dead to suck the blood of living people; another definition is: anyone who preys on others. Living or dead, there is not much difference when you look at the ravage at the end of the trail.

Vampires are devious, they are smart, and they can only stay healthy if you let them.

Vampires exist on leadership teams, middle management, at every level of an organization. They look like you, they look like me. So, how can you be aware and alert to keep them away from your soft, juicy neck, to keep them from going in for the kill?

Here are ways to detect and protect from vampires at work:

1. Don’t be naïve: think twice before you befriend someone who is always handing around, asking questions, bringing you donuts and coffee, telling you that you look tired and they are there to help, offering to take your cause to the boss, willing to pick up your cleaning, your kids, your dog to save you time and effort. Vampire energy is helpful, scratch that, overly helpful, looking for ways to soften you up. Vampires want you to be weak and beholden to them to make it easier for them to get what they want, your attention, your talent, and your connections.

2.Check all assumptions: good advice period! However, when there are those who want to prey on you they will tell you all kinds of office gossip, play all kinds of office politics to get you upset. When you become super angry and want retribution from others who may well also be innocent victims, the vampire has won and is ready to strike. So, don’t just listen, go to the source and ask if what you have heard is true. You may save lots of wasted energy and lost production.

3.Listen for clues: vampires at work often use the martyr tack to entice you. In “Don’t Bring It to Work” the martyr, one of the 13 most common behavior patterns is detected by behavior; they are first in, usually before the office is officially open and last out, way after everyone else has gone home. They are very accommodating, putting themselves last. Martyrs all sound the same; they say things like: “I just want to help you”, or “You are important so other things can wait” or “I can’t sleep so working in the middle of the night is no big deal”, or “I’m here to watch your back”.

4.Say less: vampire types love to have as much information about both your work situation and your private life as possible. They will seduce you with their own sob stories to get you to talk and talk and talk. Whatever you say can and will be used against you if you ever decide you do not want to let them suck you dry anymore. These individuals are vindictive, and love to get human resources or lawyers involved once you attempt to stop having them feed on you.

5.Keep an email trail: Make sure you let the vampire know you are not willing to play; use short, simple polite comments that you appreciate their consideration yet you do not need their extra help. Don’t slack; this is protection, like wearing a garlic necklace. You want to make sure you have documentation that you have not succumbed to their ploys so that if and when they seek revenge you have your ammunition ready for the battle.

Every office has a few vampires. Sadly, most are not aware that they are manipulating others for their own self interest. The martyr who turns into a vampire most likely was a child who was either abandoned emotionally or abused physically. They are always looking for love and acceptance in all the wrong places.

They need way more help than you can give them so be wary and be aware.

When enough colleagues feel the energy drain and begin to follow the five guidelines above the vampire can be seen in the daylight. They cannot survive in a healthy setting and when the jig is finally up they will hopefully get professional help. So, pass these tips to your co-workers and you can minimize workplace conflict.

Dr. Sylvia Lafair, Author, Leadership Educator, Executive Coach for over 30 years is an authority on leadership and workplace relationships. She is President of Creative Energy Options, Inc. Visit www.ceoptions.com and www.sylvialafair.com .

Read online: 5 Ways to Detect a Vampire at Work

Practice tolerance and think outside the box. One mistake that new managers often make is to try to change everything. Remember, just because the way someone does something isn’t the way you’d do it, doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Decide what is worth changing and what is just different.

This leads into a second good practice for new managers; avoid showing everyone who is in charge. If you may have just been promoted to manager, you might feel that you know everything there is to know about your area. However, you still must learn how to manage other people, so be sure to listen to those in your group and ask for the input when you need it.

Third, take time to get to know the people you are managing. Even if you have worked beside these people for years, that doesn’t necessarily mean you really know them. Find out what’s exciting or interesting for them, how to motivate them, and what concerns they may have. If you get to know them as individuals, you will be able to more effectively manage them.

One recent poll showed that over half of new managers received absolutely no formal training before beginning the job. If you’re a new manager, be proactive in your own training and transition process. Search the web for tips for new managers or search for training courses on the internet to help you succeed in your new position.

Pick up a course on an online learning platform like Coggno. Free courses include a Sample Negotiation Presentation, Conflict in Workplaces, and L19-Influence. For new managers there are courses such as 6 Steps to a Successful Start as a New Manager, which offers practical tips and strategies to help new managers successfully move into their new leadership role.

Coggno is a learning management system provider and online training marketplace.

Article Source: EzineArticles.com/?expert=Robin_L._Green

Read online: Three Simple Tips For Bright New Managers

Now think about an emotion. What happens if you discard it? Where does it go?

Emotions like cardboard and cans have a life cycle. They can be fleeting or hang around forever. It is a true leadership responsibility to be able to gage emotions and find the best balance between overtly showing them and intentionally stuffing them.

Ours is a culture of polarities. There are rock throwing, foot stamping zealots who use words and images to inflame, while on the other side are those who shut the emotional levers and are logical and rational all the time.

In the workplace, leaders who show awareness of emotions, who model right use of emotions, do a favor to a society which has not mastered the art and craft of balanced emotional output.

Think about the patterns of behavior you were taught as a child. Did you come from an environment where you learned it is best to be calm, cool, and collected? Were you taught that “big boys don’t cry”? Did you learn that angry outbursts got you what you wanted, or the converse, that showing anger meant getting shut away in your room?

Mastering emotions is a major aspect of high level leadership development. We do not live with logic alone. No matter how appealing it looks to leave our emotions at the door when we think things through, they are there anyway.

In this era with vast amounts of research about how the brain operates it is vital to model and help others learn the twin tasks of self awareness and self regulation. It is the skill with which we regulate emotions that allows us to achieve a wide range of flexible and adaptive behavior to solve complex problems effectively.

Unexpressed emotions do not dissolve. They sit, like discarded soda cans, rusting in the sun. They do not go away. They do not transform if left unattended. They come out in unexpected, inappropriate ways that often have nothing to do with the present situation.

They infect the workplace as well as the home, pollutants that cause us to think about an environment being toxic and unmanageable.

Take Jan for example. She was Director of Operations at a large hotel. When logic was needed t o resolve an issue, like, should there be a new sink put in one of the bathrooms, she was first rate. The right porcelain container was measured, ordered, and fit perfectly where it belonged.

Yet, when Jan had to work with her peers, with other directors in the organization, she was a petty child always needing to be the center of attention. The hungry baby part of her would show up through nasty, underhanded comments that created an environment of splitting, deception, and mistrust.

Jan was a technical success, yet an emotion failure. Her pot stirring caused so much dissention that the senior leadership team of the organization was splintered and contentious. The workplace conflict was toxic.

Just like a sick physical body that cannot fight off unhealthy bacteria, the organization was suffering from a lack of emotional health. The system was suffering.

When emotions are stuffed, when technical prowess is valued over personal relationships, when a pretend lid is put on how people handle their feelings it gets ugly. Finally, the stress of the underground emotional strains started to bubble up. Jan was seen by several colleagues “putting up her middle finger in back of a colleague with a vehemence that was above and beyond discussing new carpeting in the meeting rooms.”

Jan had grown up in a home where emotions were unacceptable. She had been physically beaten whenever she disagreed with her father as her mother stood by incapable of stopping the strong man from hurting his daughter.

This inability to express emotions overtly in a healthy manner created a tone and texture of sabotaging emotional reactions throughout her life. She was always talking about people to others behind closed doors.

She was like a robot when emotional issues were addressed. She would stare blankly, unable to acknowledge her behavior. When asked about “the finger” incident, she claimed she was just rubbing her face. No one bought it, yet there was no way to help her access the angry, fear based emotions that sat, like rusting soda cans in the landfill of her past.

Jan was eventually terminated. However, it took time and patience to recover from the damage of her splitting, polluting behavior. This story is not unusual. It is sadly, typical of workplace relationship conflict in all industries, in all organizations, large and small.

When emotions from childhood are packed down, not permitted to bubble up from the depths of ourselves, when we are not allowed to feel the feelings of hurt, disappointment, despair, and doubt, when they are not recycled in a healthy way, they show up at work and cause damage.

The complex question is both how is it possible to ferret out the toxins, and even better how do those with patterns of behavior that destroy employee morale get the help they need?

These are the human resource and leadership issues on the table today. They cause billions of dollars in lost revenue and limited productivity. These patterns from the past sit in emotionally toxic landfills and are as much a problem in our world as the oil sitting in ugly gobs in the marshes of Louisiana.

Dr. Sylvia Lafair, Author, Leadership Educator, Workplace Relationship Expert, Executive Coach for over 30 years is an authority on leadership and workplace relationships. She is President of Creative Energy Options, Inc. Visit www.ceoptions.com and www.sylvialafair.com.

Read online: Leadership: Recycling Emotions Responsibly

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