I have a friend who has recently been bitten by the “fitness bug” Its quite strange. She is not actually training for anything, yet trains hours every day. She pays $40 an hour, (which apparently is cheap) three times a week to a personal trainer. He now gets her to fill in a “food diary” so he can check what she eats everyday.
In her life outside training, nothing has importance anymore. A dinner out cannot be enjoyed as she can’t control what the chef uses as ingredients. Movies are out of the question, “don’t you know how much calories are in the butter they put on popcorn!” and family outings get in the way of her training scedule. She’s lost sight of something.
I have another friend who used to be the ultimate family man. Everything he did at work was driven by his desire to improve the lifestyle and standard of living of his wife and children. He just loved going home and sharing the fruits of his labours with them.
This friend was very concientious at work. Of course he was. His inspiration was the wellbeing of those he loved. So one day he got promoted. It was well deserved. When this happened though, something in his mind changed. All of a sudden he started measuring his worth by how far up the corporate ladder he could climb. His wife and family were relegated to a competing interest for his time. Time with them was time away from his career pursuits.
Both of these friends of mine have beate Accept-Charset: ISO-8859-1,They have become slaves as their goals, the things they were working for, have been forgotten. Now, the work is all that is left. The work which was supposed to pave the way to an end, has become the end in its own right.
My first friend started her experience with the desire to live a healthier, fuller life. Today this desire has narrowed to a life that excludes anything not related to her training schedule. My other friend’s hunger for power and career success was so strong that it displaced his love for family as his number 1 priority. It became an end in its own right when previously it was simply a means to an end.
Historically, this has never been a normal way of living. Historically, people only ever did what they had to do to support themselves and their loved ones. What time was left was honoured as time to enjoy, time to share. There was only one group of people for whom work was the end game in life, and we called them slaves. Its interesting that today, despite slavery being outlawed, people still live in a similar manner.
Ask yourself if there is work in your life which serves no purpose. It could be an exercise regime, a career, or even your perception on keeping your home overly clean.
If there is, have you become a slave to an idea? Are you toiling for no purpose. Remember you only have one life, so review this work and try to work out what it will bring you in 10 – 20 years? Will you look back on your toil and smile at the benefits it brought you? Or will you look back and see a landscape of opportunities missed?
Typically the people who become slaves to something in their lives, do so because they get so caught up in what they are doing, that they lose their perspective. Having lost perspective, the important things in life become muddied and unclear. If this sounds life you, there is a simple way to get your perspective back. You need to stop everything for one weekend. Go away for this time, on a retreat if you like. Spend this time thinking about and documenting the really important things in your life.
You’ll know you have done this well when the things that are important to you, are things that your work can “buy”, not measurements of your work. For example, a career oriented goal should not be completing the project on time and under budget, it should be affording that holiday in Tahiti. And a fitness goal should not be losing 20kg and improving your resting pulse to 68 beats per minute, it should be being competitive while playing tennis with a bunch of friends, which you will follow up with a guilt free meal and a couple of drinks.
Once you get your perspective, you’ll throw the shackles of slavery which have held you in your rut. You’ll regain control on your life, you won’t be dancing to anyone else’s tune. So protect your perspective, remember what is important in your life and make sure the work you do serves your life goals. This is very different to your life serving your work goals.
